Scottishexuals

Glengarry Highland Games

First Lumbersexuals and now … Scottishexuals!

Short and I decided that we would go on a little trip to celebrate both of our birthdays since they are one day apart. And what better destination than Cornwall, Ontario. Right? Wait, it gets better.  We actually went to a tiny town outside of Cornwall named Maxville.  Why?  Because that is where the Glengarry Highland Games are held each year.

We had such good luck with Timber a few weeks back that we thought we give a bunch of men in kilts (aka Scottishexuals) a whirl! Well, that and we wanted to check out All Things Scaw-ish. Remember? Mike Myers?

Men In Kilts 3

That SNL sketch pretty much sums up my full knowledge of Scotland.  That and the Oatmeal Crisp commercial from the 90’s.

It's Not Oatmeal!

Up until now.

I could give you a full detailed report of our excursion but, once again, we’ll do the tour with pictures.

We landed in Ottawa, got into our rental car and were off to Cornwall, who’s city slogan is:  A Place You Will Succeed and Your Family Will Thrive.  Interesting.

Glengarry Highland Games Sky

Since we arrived late afternoon, we decided to stay in town for the night and head off to the Games the next morning. We did a quick tour of downtown, I had a few drinks on a patio and Short watched (god bless her), bought Short a bathing suit at a mall, headed back to the hotel to jump in the hot tub and then off to Truffles Burger Bar which was recommended by the concierge aka the woman at the front desk of the hotel. Here, I ate a $100 burger.  The Solid Gold Burger.

Yep. Because … why not? Topped with foie gras, truffles then sprayed with 24 karat gold dust and accompanied by a glass of champers. It was good. Not great. But good.

Summation of Cornwall: small, quaint, could have done a better job with their waterfront but I’m from Toronto so who’s talking, cute main street, mall is fairly desolate, kinda reminds me of the Soo.

Up early the next day and got the Ramada Inn’s buffet breakfast (which was included). Ew.

Well, that's kinda sad. Isn't it? Sigh. But it's free with the room! #ramada #TOblogger #tofoodie @foodbloggersca #hamandfrenchtoast #Cornwall

A photo posted by The Long And The Short Of It (@longershorter) on

Then off to Manville!  Ahem.  I mean Maxville.  We made a pitstop at a Timmy’s because that Ramada breakfast did not cut it.

Glengarry Highland Games Donut

As soon as we arrived, we could hear the pipe bands practicing outside the grounds. Super awesome! We headed in along with hundreds of Scottish folk.

Glengarry Highland Games Kid

Did a quick tour of the grounds and discovered … “All Things Scaw-ish”!

Glengarry Highland Games TShirt

Glengarry Highland Games Kilts

An Assortment of Kilts

Glengarry Highland Games Leather Kilt

Leather Kilt!

And one thing Canadian …

Glengarry Highland Games Maple Floss

Note: Man In Kilt In Background

We had purchased bleacher seat tickets and that turned out to be the greatest decision of the weekend because we could see everything Scottishexual while we sat in the shade and ate and drank to our hearts content. The games opened and then there was a Strongman competition, over a hundred girls doing a simultaneous fling, a parade of all of the clans, the largest pipe band ever assembled, a tug of war. It was kind of spectacular.

Glengarry Highland Games Tossing Competition

The Sheaf Toss. See that bag? They’ve got to throw it over that crossbar. It weighs 25 pounds. Oh nothing.

Glengarry Highland Games Dancers

There were over 100 dancers circling the track!

Glengarry Highland Games Knight

Um … awesome.

Glengarry Highland Games Band

The bagpipers came close to bashing everyone in the head on their turns.

Glengarry Highland Games Tug of War

Men In Kilts Tugging!

Glengarry Highland Games Wide Shot

Panoramic Shot!

Short had great foresight regarding Cornwall’s intrigue and knew it would last exactly one day. Which meant that we decided to leave around 3 and drive to Ottawa for round two of our trip.

I haven’t been to Ottawa since I was a kid but we had limited time so no real sight seeing happened. There was a BuskerFest going on which was kinda cool.

Glengarry Highland Games Busker 1

Australian Brothers On Ladders Juggling Fire

Glengarry Highland Games Busker 2

Marie Antoinette Balancing a Cake on Her Chin

Glengarry Highland Games Busker 3

Hockey Player balancing on His Net. Apparently balancing is a big busker thing.

And we had dinner at a super awesome restaurant called Town. Love love loved it.

Glengarry Highland Games Town 1

Smoked Prosciutto and Melon Salad – Stinging Nettle Pesto, Stracciatella Cheese, Apple Balsamic Reduction, Smoked Nuts, Grilled Focaccia and Parmesan Foam.

Glengarry Highland Games Town 2

Ricotta Gnocchi – Saffron Burro Fuso, Candied Roasted Lemon Rin, Pesto Verde, Basil, Seasonal Vegetables, Parmesan and Asparagus Lovage Milk Foam

Glengarry Highland Games Town 3

Buttermilk Panna Cotta – Caramel Poached Apple, Cheddar and Pecan Crumble with an Apple Balsamic Reduction

Woke up to a proper hotel breakfast. Room Service rocks.

Glengarry Highland Games Breakfast

Then we decided to go to the Byward Market and see what was up.

This lovely woman was playing Thunderstruck by AC/DC on a traditional Japanese Shamisen.  I gave her $20 because she's awesome.

This lovely woman was playing Thunderstruck by AC/DC on a traditional Japanese Shamisen. I gave her $20 because she’s awesome.

Glengarry Highland Games Tea 1

Pu-erh McCartney Tea

Glengarry Highland Games Tea 2

Red Zeppelin Tea

Glengarry Highland Games Tea 3

Berry White Tea

Glengarry Highland Games Byward Market

Ottawa Summation: touristy, clean, very straight and kinda boring. Sorry, Ottawanians. Is that what you call them? I’m going to from now on.  Maybe if we’d had a longer stay we would have had more fun?

I wish we’d seen more Scottishexuals but I’d say thish birthday trip was a shuckshess.  I’m talking like Sean Connery now.  It makes everything shound more fun, doeshen’t it?  The Glengarry Highland Gamesh were very well run and we had a blasht. But I shink one day in Cornwall and one day in Ottawa wash enough for now. I’ve jusht got one regret. We didn’t try the Haggis Poutine. Maybe nexsht year…

Glengarry Highland Games Porter Tube

I WANT THESE! The Porter Tunnel Rocks!

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